I want to tell you how a baby changes everything in my life. A baby to me is a precious gift from God, something that can’t be taken for granted, but a lot of the time it is.

Ever since I can remember I’ve wanted children. I dreamed of the day I’d get married and start a family. Everything was going to be perfect! But little did I know, it was going to be a lot harder then I had anticipated! One abortion and two miscarriages later, here I am the mother of five. Three of my children are now in heaven, one of which we actually had a funeral for. Let me tell you, a parent is not supposed to bury their children. It is one of the hardest and traumatic things I have ever been through.

I have two sons, a 4-year-old and a 1 1/2-year-old, who are here, alive today. Rex, my 4-year-old, is as smart and healthy as can be. Carter, my 1 1/2-year-old, is our mystery baby, as we like to call him. He has multiple things going on with him from his brain, to his eyes, to his muscles. But we know that even through all of this, God has a plan for him and for my husband and I as his parents.

So, saying that “a baby changes everything”, is just like saying, “life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get”. Although I have gone through much heartache and pain, from the loss of my children, that is what brought me to New Beginnings Family Services.

The first class I did was, Threads of Hope, Pieces of Joy, the miscarriage class, with Cathy. To most people, a miscarriage is not a big deal. They may think the fetus is not really a baby until you give birth. But as a woman who has had a miscarriage, I can tell you, it is truly painful, mentally and physically. I found this class to be very healing!

One year later, I was going through the process of becoming a volunteer at New Beginnings. It was at the volunteer training that God made it clear to me, that it was time to take Surrendering the Secret, which is the post-abortion class.

I went ahead and did that, with Cathy as our group leader. Wow, very powerful stuff, especially since I didn’t think that I needed it! It took me four years to admit that I needed to let go of the shame and guilt from my abortion. I never used the word “abortion” instead I used the word “termination”. It wasn’t until after going through, Surrendering the Secret that I could use the word abortion, because I did it for medical reasons and thought that would make it okay. But it does not. I still felt the hurt and pain that goes with any abortion, until I went through the class. It was there, I was able to let go of the pain from my abortion and the guilt and shame that went with it.

This past year, I did the sexual healing class, Steps to Sexual Health. I was amazed at all the things I learned and how to deal with the junk that I had stuffed so far down inside of me from years ago.

Throughout all my pain and trials, New Beginnings has impacted my life for the better! I have grown emotionally and spiritually through the help of their classes.